A newly minted Marine

This was our Marine on family day He had On Base Liberty to be with us for about 5 hours. Chris is front and center.


This is Private Warren and Private Lodin both from Minnesota immediately after Graduation and leaving the Parade Deck!!

As the world turns..

The past week has been blur. Filled with craziness. I have had indescribable emotions.
I worked last weekend (so I started the week tired) due to a schedule change I had 2 days off IN A ROW in the middle of the week. This NEVER happens. I decided to go see my grandsons. Oh, have they grown in the 4 weeks since I saw them last.


But before I left my husband and I started to talk about church, the diaconate and the need for us to come to terms with some things that are going on. With as crazy as the last year has been for us -this next year is looking to be as busy. So Todd will be looking to take a sabbatical from his church duties until things at work and home calm down. I really thought as our kids moved on after high school and college things would free us up to have more time for extra things rather then less time.
DH has always put God first, me second, the kids 3rd, his job 4th and the Diaconate last. There have been times (with need) this order has been out of step for a while but over the years he has managed to keep things in check. My job at the church? I have none. Of choice my role at church has been to support my husband. I was not ordained and I did not need to search for my role, many deacons wives search for their place in their husbands Deacon ministry. I have never needed to. I firmly see my role as one of love and support. This has always felt right for me. But it is hard to pull back. The only other time he has had to do this was the year our oldest son was dealing with cancer treatment.
So I went to our daughter's to see the grandbabies with my thoughts on many things. The drive allowed me to find a peace with the decision we have wrestled with - prayer and music helped!
And time with babies is always life nurturing and filled with blessing.
Arriving home I was met with some not totally unexpected news but news that reassured me that the past 2 days had been well worth my time for prayer, and that our plan is a good one. Now we need prayers that the Diocesan offices will see our need and grant the sabbatical.
I called in sick the day after I got home. My ears have been so plugged with occasional pain over the past 2 months and has gotten to the point that I went to the doctor. He does not think I have an ear infection but the amount of fluid behind my eardrum needs to be taken care of. So prednisone to help decrease the fluid and if this doesn't work I will likely need tubes to help equalize the pressure. The prednisone after 2 days seems to be helpng very little but I have 4 days left of the medicine... I really don't want tubes.

However I ended the week on a good note.
We celebrated my dad's 86th birthday on Friday evening.
My mom is recovering very well from her double knee surgery/
Saturday I was up early to go to the cities to meet with my brothers family to do the Cystic Fibrosis Climb for a Cure -IDS center 1028 steps, 50 stories. The team raised over 6000 dollars for CF. I have a niece and a nephew with CF -my niece has spent a lot of time in the hospital this past year and my nephew is hospitalized now and could not be at the climb. There is not much we can do for them but pray and support. And it felt good to be there to climb. I did not raise money this year other then what we donated ourselves. And my brother gave me the additional amount I needed to get a t-shirt. Funny guy ...I had donated on his goal and he handed off half of that for a t shirt. Next time I will do better. And I made it the entire way!!


I ended my week going to mass with my sister and her husband and then meeting up with another brother and sister-in-law for supper and then 7 out of nine of my sibs (and spouses) went to Church Basement Ladies A 2nd helping. It was a good time -we laughed we cried!! My sister Brenda laughed so hard we thought she laid an egg!!

R & R

This is the first day I have had in months that did not have a schedule.

I put a bunch of Christmas cards in the mail this morning. I had about 3/4 of my letters done before my life went out of control but today I finished the majority of them. I have Christmas presents for co-workers that are still sitting in my closet waiting to be wrapped. I am so far behind with those!!

I am supposed to be working on weight loss I made it to the club twice since January 1st. I figure the way things have been going twice is doing good.

We received our 5th and 6th letters from our recruit this week. It is so good to hear from him. He sounds so up beat in his letters. And he is trying hard to keep us informed as much as he can. In one of his first letters he talked about applying and being accepted to being a Catholic Prayer Leader. He goes to classes weekly with a Chaplain and has been learning how to lead prayer for the Catholics in his platoon.

Then in one of his last letters he shared about a gift passed on to him from a recruit in another company that was in the 3rd phase of Boot Camp.
He wrote "Last Tuesday a ___ Co. recruit passed onto me something a 3rd phase recruit had given him before him...... and so on and so forth. It is a crucifix, a St. Christopher medal, 2 shields of strength with Romans 8:37 and 8:38 on them and a dog tag with Joshua 1:9 on it. It was pretty cool. On marine week I will pass it to a phase 1 recruit."

I find it amazing how his faith walk is being strengthened in this time. His love of Mass and Eucharist has always been strong. But I find at a time that things could be more difficult God is working to keep his faith alive and strong for himself and for others. God is so awesome. God is so Good.

We laugh as we read his letters lately food seems to occupy a lot of his time. In this same letter he wrote I still haven't gotten dessert but I've been tempted. Thus, I decree! Mother when you come hither to San Diego I beseech thee to make any and all bars you will bring (especially chocolate chip cookie bars) I can't wait for the sweets.

I had to read it twice to see if he had somehow been zapped to a different era. Who uses words like decree, beseech and hither today? My son in Boot Camp

He makes us laugh even as we miss him <3

We Got Mail !!!

Chris has been at MCRD in San Diego since 12/13
He left on the 12th so it has been 18 days.
We received a Form letter with his address on Monday. We had 6 letters in the mail to him by Tuesday morning. And there have been 3 more since.
Today we received our first REAL mail from him. 2 letters.
They were everything we hoped for - long letters that told us things were going well.
They made us laugh out loud.

Oh how I LOVE my son!!

He even wrote us a poem


Hello mudda, Hello fadda
Here I am in
San Diego
It ain't nice though
It's pretty rainy
Sometimes all this training
gets a little draining

His sense of humor shines through.
Oh do I MISS my son!!
But I believe he is right where God wants him right now.



Oh how PROUD I am of my son!!

Mail days are HAPPY DAYS - here's to many more Happy Days!!

Goodbye and Hello

Chris and Dad



Chris and His godparents


With Grandpa and Grandma


Chris and Megan



with Nick and Jackie


with C & D


A new Grampa and Gramma were also born!!



Our first grandsons










The family


How can we end up with this many unmatched socks in just 4 days?

A goal accomplished

Our son Nick wanted to join the Air Guard. When he graduated from High School that was his plan. He didn't want to go to college - he wanted to go to boot camp. With some medical delays he was forced to wait until the October after his graduation to enlist. But on the Monday before Labor day I came home from work to find him at home, not at his much needed job. When hubs arrived home I explained that Nick was home and I wasn't certain why he wasn't at work. My DH noticed a hospital band on Nicks wrist and he told Nick if he was having medical tests it would be nice to keep us informed, as we would be paying the bills. Nick very angry (and afraid) snapped that he had been in the clinic and the hospital all day having tests, and that the clinic called wanting him back before they closed to go over his tests. As he slammed out of the house he yelled "And they haven't ruled out cancer"

Cancer -what an ugly word. Life Changing. The fact that the clinic called to see him before closing, that they wanted to go over the results of the tests in person scared me. I asked if he wanted us to with him he said no. An hour later he called home and asked if I could go to a surgeon's appointment with him the next day. At home he told us he had been having swelling and increased pain in his groin all weekend. It became so severe on Monday he went to our doctor.

His appointment with the urologist was for 10 AM on Tuesday. After an exam and discussion Nick was told he would have to have surgery to remove the testicle. Most definitely cancer, not certain of the stage. The surgeon said he had time at 1:30 today or Thursday. Nick chose Thursday but after the surgeon left the room I asked why he was waiting - the outcome wouldn't be different and his anxiety would increase over the next few days. Nick decided to have surgery that same day. By 9 PM we were back at home with our son. A life changing diagnosis and a life changing surgery in just a few short hours. On Friday of that same week, just 3 days later, he met with the oncologist. He was given 3 choices. First chemotherapy - several meds for short duration and follow up for a few years. 2nd was surgery from below his sternum to his groin to remove lymph nodes. The possibility of certain physical problems with this surgery put it on the no list, don't even want to consider it. 3rd he could have exams every month then every 2 months then 3 months then 4 months and so on for 5-6 years with the possibility that the cancer was not contained during the surgery to remove the testicle. Nick chose chemotherapy. He wanted the shortest possible treatment to get him back to living his life.

Treatment was completed with a just a few hitches. His hair was falling out at the end of week 1 by week 7 he was done with his treatment. Enlisting and Boot Camp were out of the question. The recruiters told him 3 years and he could try again. He had to go to college that January to stay on our insurance since he was turning 19. But he didn't do well -with continued fatigue and terrible classes, like the History of Rock and Roll. He slept a lot, lost a lot of weight and failed every class that spring. It was 18 months after surgery and treatment that he told us he felt normal again.

He continued with school and has an Associate degree in Advertising and Design with an emphasis in photography. He works full time and continues to attend college for an additional degree. After 3 years he went back to enlist. He was rejected again and again and again. I lost count of the number of times he met with recruiters. The number of times he was told no.

Then a few months ago he received his clearance now he needed to find a job -his MOS. He wanted to be a load master (whatever that is) actually he wanted to be a lot of things but many jobs were closed to him because he is color blind or in military language color deficient. But he persevered again and yesterday we received the call we had been waiting all day to hear - "Well it's official I have enlisted in the Air Guard. My first drill weekend will be in October."

At Nicks request the recruiter cut off the LIVESTRONG bracelet that Nick has worn for the 6 years since his cancer.

Goal Accomplished. Congratulations Nick.




Nick




Nick with his sisters last Christmas




All 4 at #4's graduation

He is off for boot camp

This past week we had supper at our house for Michael and his parents and the boys recruiter. The recruiter brought his wife and 1 year old daughter. It was a difficult night. Michael leaves today he will be 2 months ahead of Chris.

Chris and Michael went camping for 3 days. They have been talking about doing this all summer. It was a time for them to talk and spend time together. This weekend Michael said goodbye to his girlfriend. He told us they both cried. I know Chris and Megan will be going through the same good byes in a few short weeks.

These 2 young men have soft caring hearts but they are both totally committed to the decision they have made to serve our country.

How can we not be proud of the men and women who have chose to enlist and serve our country. The night of the supper I took pictures of the boys smoking cigars - these are the only pictures I have of that night.

Please pray for our soldiers.

Back to school

Tomorrow we head to Madison Wi to take our daughter back to school. This is her 5th year although since she took a semester off it she will actually graduate in 4 1/2 years. She has had a rough summer. We asked her to be home this summer since she has been away the past 2. She looked for a job (hardly) And I know there are not many jobs out there for part time summer help. So she slept in every day did nothing EVERY day and drove me crazy. I loved having her here. I am going to miss her. This will be our final drop off at college since neither of the boys will live in dorms. I feel sad. ANOTHER chapter is at the beginning of the end.

The end of summer or all I can do is pray

I always have a hard time the end of August. No matter how many things we did with our kids through the summer I wished that we had more time together before school starts again. It was not easy to change thought process and get excited about getting ready for school to begin.

Excitement of new classes, getting back with friends not seen since summer began and the anticipation of new friends. Shopping for new shoes and the multitude of notebooks and folders each child needed.

Life did not change so much over the years. The kids left for college and the heartbreak of the end of summer was a little more since we would see them a lot less. But children grow up and we need to let go and pray for them always.
My oldest daughter was home twice this past week both times without her husband. The first time for a cousins wedding and the second time for a bridal shower for a cousin whose wedding she most likely miss. She is at 21 weeks with twins. When she left for her home it was another chapter ending the next time she walks into our house she will be bringing babies with her. I don't expect her back before March. Hopefully we will be able to go there a few times. In the meantime I will pray.

My oldest son shot his first wedding this month. The pictures turned out amazing. I am not certain what is in his future and I worry about his relationship commitment and his job. He is struggling with money and lives in our basement. Sometimes I think he would be better off if he moved out and other times I am glad he is here since his girlfriend is here every weekend and she sleeps on our sofa. (underlined they do not sleep together under our roof.) His girlfriend is a really nice young woman. She also struggles with jobs, currently lives with her parents and hates what she does. All I can do is pray.

Our youngest daughter is getting ready to move back to college. She will finish with degrees in communications and technical theater. I worry about her paying back school loans and making ends meet and friends. This young woman is so black and white in many of her views. She lives the farthest away right now -6 1/2 hours. She is 2+ hours farther then her sister. I worry about her future. All I can do is pray.

Our youngest son is watching his friends pack up for college. He told me yesterday he is "freaking" excited about his own plans. He has no regrets about his decision. Last night he went to Wicked with his girlfriend. This was the last thing they planned to do before she leaves for college next weekend. Well, going to the theater and breaking up. When they started dating 3 months ago they made plans for this breakup. My son is leaving in December for boot camp. He wanted this young woman to be able to go and meet people and do the college thing without worrying about her boyfriend in the Marine Corps. In my head I know they are making a good decision there will be no Dear John or Dear Jane letters. They may both meet someone else or God may bring them back together. In my heart I know that we cannot turn love off like a water faucet. This will be more difficult then either of them expects. All I can do is pray.

preparing

This has been a wild week. It seems like my charting for work never ends. And then there is home life: We are trying to get laundry caught up, the house cleaned, packed for a week of tent camping, a wedding gift to find and all of that on top of getting the shower invites out for Heather's bridal shower. My plate is spilling over and I desperately need a break.

a back up blog post

7/08/2010
Reunion

This weekend we will be going to the yearly reunion. I think this is the 33rd or 34th year. In all that time I missed 1 year. When we started my oldest siblings had toddlers and most of us were not married.
My mom is expecting about 130 for noon lunch on Saturday. This is the one time of the year that the family is together without weddings or graduations or other celebrations. My folks will be spending the night at a grandson's home instead of sleeping in a tent as they have done for so many years. He just built a new house 10 minutes from the state park.
There are many who cannot be there which is ok since this year we have had 3 high school graduations and 1 wedding with 4 more to go. Total possible = 2 parents + 9 kids + 9 spouses + 49 grand kids + 18 grandkids by marriage + 31 Great-grandchildren + 3 Fiances = 121 (Is my math right?) Then add numerous girl friends and boy friends easily 130 - although we already know there are at least 18 not coming.
But then we add in extended family. My Cousin Allen and his family + 12. (My mom's sister Shirley's oldest son) they adopted our family camping trip 13 years ago when they lost their parents -this was a good way to stay connected with family. Each year they come to spend the weekend with us and usually stay an additional few days with their immediate family. Their kids hail in from Oklahoma and other parts south - I figure they stay extra days to recover from the time spent with us !!!
This year there are 3 pinatas packed with candy. We always start youngest to oldest and end with the addition of those "old Kids" newbies who have never hit a pinata. And it usually takes quite a bit of coercion to get them to take a swing at the thing. These are usually fiances or friends who have never actually hit a pinata. I see this as a kind of right of passage. Mom or dad h0lding the baby and a bat for a swing and a picture. Toddlers swinging by themselves for the first time. And on up through the years until we reach the newest "adult" arrivals - the fiances and friends.
So tonight we will pack and we will leave in the morning for a wild weekend of family togetherness. And hopefully some down time to rest and regroup.

letter to my son

Dear Nick

I need to talk to you and I can never say the things that I want to when we are with you. Mostly because you are not approachable about things you do not want to talk about. You will get louder and drown us out. You will begin to argue without listening to the other side

I am not certain what you are looking for in life but I am seeing you always looking for something. The funny thing is I do not see you looking for someone. The first person you call is Jackie. The first person you think of is Jackie. You keep telling me she is not mature enough and she has to change. And she ticks you off. But the person you want most to be with is Jackie.

You need to make a decision about marriage. If you plan to spend the rest of your lives together - playing, celebrating, sharing, raising a family, growing old together and grieving. Then do it. What are you waiting for? You are already doing all of those things with Jackie. Other people have married to be together with far less material stuff then the 2 of you have. The perfect time will be never.

But a couple cannot live together outside of marriage and pretend to be married without damaging each other in the relationship because there is never a commitment to work things out. You may say ‘we are not living together’ I say you are. You have Jackie coming regularly to be with you -sharing your life. I know you keep your door open and she sleeps on the sofa. I have been told to not be naive. Should I not trust you? You are 24 and you have been brought up to know what is right and wrong.

If you love Jackie, as I think you do, then you should be making a commitment to spend your lives together. If you do not love Jackie then you should end the relationship. She should not be sleeping under our roof 3-4 nights of each week. We need to cut our ties because this will already be more painful than I can imagine (for me) I can’t imagine how ending this relationship would effect you. I have grown to love Jackie. I will celebrate if you marry I will cry if you separate.

Marriage is scary. Not knowing what the future holds is scary. Not having everything you want or desire is unfortunate.
Being together with the person you love is priceless.


Please make time to talk with me.
I love you
Mom